How do you weather the storms in your relationship?
We all have them in one way or another but…
What do you do when you’re in the middle of them or they’re so frequent you wonder if your relationship will survive?
A few days ago we got back from our vacation at a Florida beach and although we had a great time laughing, loving, playing, marveling at and appreciating God’s beauty and majesty showing up in the form of lovely blue water and magnificent sunsets…
We were glad to escape the coming stormy weather of a hurricane.
While we could jump on a plane and come back to the cool, clear almost fall like weather of Ohio, millions of people are still in the path of a serious storm.
The weather and storms are a lot like our relationships.
Storms appearing as disagreements, quarrels and resentments come and go in relationships but…
What do you do when you’re caught in a stormy relationship that seems to be only filled with upsets and anger?
How do you deal with the storms that do come up so they don’t ruin your relationship?
Here are 3 ways to not only weather the storms in your relationship but move through them with love and grace…
1. Realize that storms do pass
Like the weather, our “storms” in relationships do pass if we let them.
The tendency of many of us is to mull over what happened, make it bigger and keep it alive.
We can make a choice to realize what we’re doing and stop scratching the “sore” while still having healthy boundaries.
2. Step back to glimpse what your role is in keeping the storm alive
When you’re in the middle of conflict, you can’t see it clearly because your emotions are clouding your vision.
Stepping back gives you an objective glimpse of how you may have inadvertently contributed to the “storm” and kept it going.
Of course your partner played his or her role in agitating the storm and making it bigger but focusing on that won’t get you what you want.
Stepping back allows you to make a choice whether to keep the quarrel going–or not.
And in that conscious choice is peace and love–for yourself and for the other person.
3. Recognize moments of connection, no matter how scarce.
When you’re trying to weather the storms in your relationship, you often lose sight of any moment of connection that might happen.
When you see a moment of connection, milk it for all it’s worth.
Don’t hold back and see what happens.
It may be that you see there aren’t enough of those moments or that this relationship isn’t what you want.
But within that moment, it just may be that you see light in the crack that’s made in the constant stormy weather.
Like this current hurricane, storms do pass on their own if you let them.
You can have more love and peace in your life and relationships.