Allow me to turn on the “way back” machine for just a moment and as I do this, think about these words…. (there’s a relationship lesson in this if you play along)
“Yeah, Come on, Come On, Come On, Come On Now touch me babe…”
I hope you’re not stumped because these words are the first line of one of the biggest hit songs the 60’s and 70’s rock band “The Doors” ever had. The song was of course,”Touch Me.”
What you may not know is that this is also a big clue to one of the things that women MOST want from their men and men don’t do it (at least in the way that she wants).
The men that I talk to and the men that I work with in my Relationship Breakthrough coaching practice tell me…
“I want my woman to want me more…”
“I want more sex…”
“I want a better love life. My relationship with my woman just isn’t as intimate or as passionate as it used to be… ”
And a million other things…
Men want to know “What can I do to make things different and better?”
Here’s something I’ve discovered about love and my relationship with my woman–Love, intimacy, passion and smoking-hot sex starts way before you get to the bedroom. Most guys don’t realize this.
One of the reasons I think this is because at some level we think our woman should be just like us. The thought or idea of love, lovemaking or sex comes into our minds and then we start visualizing, imagining, hoping, wanting and pretty soon (like in about 3 minutes),we’re ready.
The problem is that it doesn’t work that way for our women. For women, it’s what happens in the 24 hours (or more) prior to this moment that we want to make something happen in the bedroom that determines whether they’re open to being intimate or sexual with us.
What’s important is to make love with her ALL day and not just in the 3 minutes before you want to be intimate. Flirt with her ALL day and not just when you want her to be intimate. Talk to her in a loving way ALL day and not just when you want to get her behind closed doors. Touch her ALL day in loving, gentle, sexy, playful and flirty ways ALL day EVERY day and not just when you “want” her.
If you’re like most men when you read what I just said and you want more sex, you’re thinking, “But I do those things, already!” If she’s not responding to you, I’m willing to bet that you don’t, otherwise you’d be getting more of what you want from her.
I operate from a very simple premise with my woman and this premise is–I can get everything I want from her (and more) if I will only give her want she wants from me (her man). This sounds so incredibly simple that it sounds almost too simple and too good to be true.
But it’s not.
I try my best to give my woman everything she wants from her man and my rewards are incredible. We make love every single day. She’s kind and nice to me. We laugh and love all the time and from what I can tell, it is only going to get better with her.
The same thing can happen with you if you only make some shifts in your thought, beliefs and actions with your woman.
So, what’s one thing you can focus on to build more passion, energy, connection and desire from and with your woman?
Do what I suggested a few moments ago and “touch” your woman.
That’s right touch her. Your woman is craving your touch. She wants to feel your caress, a touch on the back, a touch of the hand as you’re putting the dishes away and any other time you can “accidentally” or on purpose touch her.
You can have so much more than you do right now in your relationship or marriage if you will only tune into your woman and give her more of what she wants and this includes “touching.”
Just to make sure I’m clear–this “touching” that I’m talking about isn’t some manipulative trick to get her into the bedroom more often. A non-sexual touch can demonstrate how much you love her in a way that you might not understand but she will.
Remember, whether your touch is sexual or non-sexual (I suggest you mix it up throughout the day)–it’s about connection with her and NOT about manipulation. It’s touching her to make HER feel good as well as to increase connection and desire for you.
You can light up your woman so much more than you think. I know you can and I’m in your corner.