When your partner clams up and pulls away...
You've just come home after a busy work day and you just want to relax but you can't...
Without looking at you or even a "hello," your partner immediately starts telling you what has to be done that evening.
And when you don't answer because you're a bit overwhelmed by all of it, your partner starts complaining that you never do anything around the house to help and wants to talk about what's wrong with your relationship.
You try to listen and respond but the "right" words just don't come and it ends up in a horrific fight and you don't know how it happened.
Not a lot of fun, is it?
Pretty much an automatic shut-down, isn't it?
We know this scenario isn't true for every couple but it is true for more than you can imagine...
...because opposites do attract and this very moment in time (or something very close to it) really is familiar for many
men and women.
We don't like to generalize but in our research, many women want their man to open up and are frustrated because he won't talk.
And many men are equally as frustrated because they feel pushed into talking and sharing--and have learned to automatically withdraw and shut down when she even looks like she wants to talk.
Now of course both women and men do this unconsciously and most are just automatically doing what they were shown and learned to do to get their needs met early in their lives.
But it really doesn't have to be that way.
In fact, it's just the opposite.